Redux: Cheap Weege Q&A
We spent the last few weeks letting you ask our so-called experts Steve Matthes and Jason Thomas questions about supercross. In the case of Matthes especially, the expertise is quite dubious and highly questionable. As for JT, he crows about predicting the last four 450SX Championships accurately, so that’s something, we suppose. Dungey in 2015 was not a slam dunk choice.
We do have a staff member who claims to be a walking and talking encyclopedia on a topic, but that topic is not motocross or supercross. Our Jason Weigandt is extremely frugal cheap. And while cheapskates are not known as givers, Weigandt knows advice is free.
So, you asked, and he delivered.
Some questions have been lightly edited for clarity.
The few times you ride your bike a year, do you buy gas or do you go to JGR and drain some of Filthy Phil’s gas from his tank?
You’re onto something, as you can never waste gas. The real key is to find a good funnel that allows your various gas tanks (I have a big one for the dirt bike and a small one for the lawn mower) to fill your car. Old gas sitting in the garage? Burn that during your commute! I did this over the weekend—lawn mowing season is over and I had at least a half-gallon sitting in the jug. That’s about $1.50 in gas.
Note: You must be careful with this process. Scientists claim females can smell .000001 kgs of gasoline fumes from the next-closest town, even if it’s contained within garage walls. Also, man has yet to discover a woman who “likes” the smell of gas. If you even spill a drop of the fuel in your garage, your wife is going to burn you in a totally different way.
After you take a crap, do you limit yourself to 1 or 2 TP squares per wipe?
Thanks, Callan. Hate to waffle on the answer, but I’d say the average is 1.5 squares. Experience will tell you if you need to prep one-square or a two-square wipe. One thing is for certain, no wipe should ever require more than two.
And is it one ply or two?
Rob Fig Naughton
Fig: I would prefer one, but house rules dictate two, unfortunately.
Or do you go Gladiator and bypass the paper and go straight into the shower once the business is done?
I have not heard of this process, but I am very interested! Always thought of myself as the Russell Crowe type.
Do you ever go to buffets, and if so, do you pocket food for later?
Hey, YZ. Buffets have a long and storied history within the Weigandt family tree. Unfortunately, it’s quite tragic. My dad, proudly, will NEVER go to a restaurant that requires tipping. He’s the Most Interesting Man in the World when it comes to this topic, as in, “I don’t always go to restaurants, but when I do, I prefer no tipping.”
One would think this would restrict us to fast food establishments, but when dad wanted to splurge, he would take us to a buffet. Unlimited food and no tipping! (Some say you should tip that poor soul who clears dirty plates. Anyone who says that should be jailed.) Weigandt family trips always included trips to the salad bar. We also had a few rules: no soda, no bread. These are cheap products designed to fill your stomach before you get to the meat.
Since I was groomed at a young age, I developed a special set of skills, to the point where my food was stacked so high on the buffet plate that it resembled a work of art. One day, much later in life, I was introduced to a new concept: the “regular restaurant.” They feature a wait staff, and, yes, you must tip them; however, like a good stock broker, they pay for themselves. One time, one of these “waiters” suggested a box for my leftover food. You cannot bring leftovers home from a buffet (perhaps you could sneak a roll, but remember the “no bread” rule). I realized if you can find a restaurant serving senseless proportions, you can eat a small bit and feed yourself leftover lunches for days. I had spent years trying to eat three days’ worth of food in one sitting at the buffet, but alas, within 48 hours or so, I would grow hungry again. The buffet might be all-you-can-eat, but the restaurant doggie bag offers all-you-can-eat now and later!
The ultimate: Ruby Tuesday’s send coupons for half off an entree. They also have a salad bar. I go nuts on that thing and just have the entree put in a box before it even comes to the table.
I once tried introducing this concept to my dad. We have not spoken since.
What is your views on filling up the gas tank on the Jeep? Do you fill it up every time? Or do a quick splash of $20 and call it good?
Some say time is money. This is untrue, because only money is money. However, if you can’t save money, you might as well save time. I only fill when I get to E. Deeeep into the E. I put that soot and sludge on the bottom of the tank and I’m going to use it. You’re going to ultimately buy the same amount of gas over the course of time, but if you can do it with fewer gas station stops, it does save time. Also, there’s a chance you can stretch to the next billing cycle of your credit card.
When you stay at hotels, do you take home the unused shampoo/conditioner and rolls of toilet paper? I personally do =)
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK!?!?!?!
Obviously, if it's brown, you flush it down, but if it's yellow, do you let it mellow?
WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK!?!?!?!
Jason, what are your feelings on re-gifting? Second, do you wrap up coupons and give them as gifts or stocking stuffers?
Re-gifting absolutely works. It’s a simple concept with kids, because they outgrow toys and it seems perfectly fine—even charitable—to “share” their old stuff with someone younger. As for adults, I don’t recommend it for most. However, if you’re raised with Italians in the Northeast, as I was, it’s fine. In New Jersey, no one has ever given an adult a Christmas gift without then following with the line, “Oh, you should have seen the deal I got on that!”
Do you reuse sandwich bags?
Sensitive topic, Feder. I make my daughter’s PBJ every morning (hell no, we won’t go… to the line where you buy lunch) and she freaking wastes the bag every day. It never comes home! People talk of Millennials being spoiled and entitled; well, if this is any indication, we ain’t seen nothing yet.
I do what I can. The FAA requires one-quart zip lock bags to carry toiletries on a plane. I reuse the same bag all year.
Should I leave a tip when picking up take out, even during the holidays?
Don’t be stupid, Townsend.
Do you "recycle" the same drink cup every time you eat at McDonald’s, which is every night?
Todd, even the McDonald’s Dollar Menu costs at least a dollar, so no way I’m going there every night. However, you’re on the right path with the cup. I often find I’m more productive working at a Starbucks, but that place is crazy expensive. As long as you have a Starbucks cup near you, though, no one will bother you while you soak up the Wi-Fi. One $2.23 small regular coffee can get me through the week at that place.
How many times do you wear a pair of jeans before you wash them?
Wasn’t aware they can be washed.
Assuming you were gifted a Keurig coffee maker, how many passes do you make on a cup of grounds? My wife is very “efficient” and does one replay always using clean water, but do the hits just keep coming at the Weigandt household? Furthermore, are you running the brown water through the machine for additional octane on the third cup? Bonus question–do you liberate the unused Keurig flavor cups when checking out of the hotel to build up your inventory? I need to know how a seasoned pro handles the coffee obstacle.
Big Ugly Maniac, you’ve provided so many great suggestions here that I’m considering breaking my own personal safety rule, which is “don’t invite anyone named Big Ugly Maniac to your house,” and indeed invite you over.
As for Keurig: I’m a relative neophyte when it comes to coffee, as I only started wasting money drinking it after pulling numerous all-nighters when my daughter was born (see above answer about spoiled, entitled kids). I still don’t know much about how to make it; I can only operate in a small operational window. Best yet, my mom gave me a percolator a few years ago which does not even use filters!
I know in my heart of hearts that I do not possess the mechanical knowledge nor coffee experience to operate the Keurig. Many a Saturday has been spent in a factory team semi staring at the machine, trying to understand it, after a team staffer said, “Hey, help yourself to a cup of coffee.” Do you know how embarrassing it is to be offered free coffee only to later emerge from the rig, empty-handed, tail tucked between the legs?
How did a pro-level efficiency expert end up driving a Jeep? Were they asking too much for Toyota Tercels on Craigslist? Is the Jeep actually a loaner from a relative? Gas ain’t cheap, so there has to be a backstory!
Big Ugly, dammit, I just rescinded your invitation. Yes, I drive Jeeps. I believe even the cheap amongst us should be allowed to spend the money saved on most things on one hobby they love. Come on, is it not the dream of all of us to own a sweet piece of land with a multitude of tracks, a huge shop/garage filled with dirt bikes, and then throw a POS mobile home on it for living quarters?
I buy dirt bikes and I drive a Jeep. That’s where the money goes. However, if I was trying to be initiated into some cheap cult, I could pass the test. Jeeps have insane resale value. Parts are plentiful and cheap on Craigslist. And, finally, there’s this website called Turo which allows you to rent your vehicle out to others—it’s the sharing economy. Hey, my Jeep isn’t even going to be used on weekends while I’m at the races, so why not rent it to someone else?
Between the rental and the resale, it might end up being free in the long run.
As a fellow cheapskate, I've sometimes experienced the "Penny wise, pound foolish" cliché. What was your most costly experience that resulted from trying to save money?
Roth IRA or 401K?
401k FTW, but that’s not your choice—your employer makes that call.
What is your favorite money saving advice to give us poor listeners?
As mentioned above: time is not money. Money is money. The only free labor is your own. Hire yourself!
Do you approve of my three rules for cheapness/financial success? 1.) Do not spend money on women. 2.) Do not race motorcycles. 3.) Do not drink alcohol.
3.) Do not drink alcohol.
I'm not going to call this a recipe for happiness, but going MGTOW, riding for fun, and not being a booze-hound will certainly improve cash flow and put one in the running for cheapest homo-sapien on earth.
– former intern "Brent" (Frank Spinker)
Indeed, for cheapness, women, bikes, and booze don’t pay. But I recently watched a movie where some old guy lived like this, and it got so bad that three ghosts visited him in the middle of the night and scared him into spending all of his money for Christmas. You gotta have an outlet or someday you’re gonna blow (it).
I do the following to save money: I pee in the sink and give it a quick spritz of water. I cut my own hair. I have a pay-as-you-go phone to not have a phone bill. I plan on driving my ’08 Ridgeline (Matthes would approve) until it expires or I expire. I ride a two-stroke. I only play the missions on Call of Duty to not have a Wi-Fi bill. Breakfast is usually peanut butter and granola bars. I order regular coffee at Starbucks. And finally, I live in Pittsburgh!
And finally, I live in Pittsburgh!
Have I gone too far? Can any human female overlook all of this?
Another zinger, Frank! I’m going to be in Pittsburgh tomorrow, flying in for our Supercross Preview Videos in the Morgantown office. We need to meet up for a cheap date! In fact, I have not yet arranged for a car, perhaps you can swing the Ridgeline by the airport… surely there are some granolas in the door pockets.
What's the one thing you don't cheap out on?
The Jeep thing mentioned above. Each day, I get closer and closer to buying a $3,000 truck on Craigslist and calling it good. Please, go to Turo and rent my Jeep!
I'm going to assume you have some pretty strict thermostat rules in the Weigandt family home. What type of numbers are we looking at for the temperature you make your family endure in the winters and summers? And do you find that when you're away at a race, that they ignore the rules and heat/cool at unreasonably lavish temperatures?
Excellent question. We’re locked in for 78 in summer and 66 in winter. God gifted me with the greatest wife ever, and I say that because she has literally never been warm for one minute of her life. I could probably crank it up to 80 in July and she would be fine. As for me, I can just sweat when I sleep. It provides a cooling effect and really, if you’re sleeping, you’re not even noticing.
Her coldness, of course, does become a problem in winter, so that’s why I had to ditch Morgantown and move South.
One critical element is an understanding that heat rises. I try to split my house into two seasons—everyone congregates downstairs in summer, and upstairs in winter. My wife, with all of the dexterity she can muster from her frozen hands, consistently sneaks downstairs and tries to push the thermostat above 66. This is what divorce lawyers call “irreconcilable differences.” See, going above 66 downstairs just pumps more heat upward, and the second-story grows super heated. As do I.
Get back to work, AFred.
As a former Raceway Park regular, I'm curious: what years did you flag there? Have you ever gotten roosted flagging? Any good flagging stories? It couldn't have been for the free food (hockey puck burgers), or was it?
I flagged from 1998-2001. And I actually did do it for the money. They paid $40 a day back then and for a college student, that is good money. Some will say the hourly rate of $40 for a 12-hour day doesn’t stack up, but that advice comes from those “time is money” idiots.
When your kids leave milk and cookies out for Santa, do you: A) Quickly drink the milk after they go to bed. B) Pour the milk down the drain. C) Pour the milk back into the carton for later use. D) Do not allow them to leave milk and cookies out for Santa. E) Do not celebrate Christmas because it is a waste of money.
E) Do not celebrate Christmas because it is a waste of money.
I just cancelled Christmas. Thank you!